Hola Wonderful People,
This week please sit down in your bikinis (even you nanny), pina coladas and sun glasses..in your loungers of course.
NB It may appear that this week was wasted…but we had to remain somewhere for a week for the malaria pills to kick in!
Monday 7th July
Woke up hot and bothered and annoyed that our fan didnt work. We loved this hotel, how could they supply us with a room with a broken fan, how, how??
We went out for our free breakfast under the thatched terrace, played with the dogs for a while and complained to “green eyes” that the fan didnt work. Laura had rib ache but when I went for a closer inspection….I do have to inspect everything and i mean everything but i wont go in to detail… I will just say that we have grown very close…I noticed 2 insane bruises and then i realised that they were from her trying to mount the boat in Tulum, she does bruise easily!
“Green eyes” checked the fan and it was fine…can you believe it was user error, we had the thing on 5 which was fast in Room 16 not in Room 13 it meant SLOW! How were we supposed to know. (Green Eyes is called green eyes as we dont know his name and obviously he has green eyes….i did say to Laura how funny it would be if his actual name was infact Green Eyes!! She said she was going to ask him his name but I wasnt interested in knowing as as far as i was concerned his name was Green Eyes….his name is Marcus! im gutted).
We decided on a day on the beach to top up our tan but first i needed to phone my bank as i had no way of paying for anything. Luckily the phone was right on the beach so whilst on hold I striped to my bikini… i was on hold for a looooooong time and still nothing had been sorted! so cut my losses and went to our usual spot on the beach. As the sea is so warm it has been easy for me to go for a swim 3 or 4 times which would never happen normally as Tom knows only too well. Then the thunder started and the clouds came and we both thought how amazing it would be to swim in the rain and thunderstorm! We ran back to the hotel to drop off our valuables before the rain poured and poured, it rained so hard. We went laughing all the way to the beach and ran into the sea. It was one of the best experiences ive ever had. We were splashing about and shouting. Some locals started talking to us as they thought we were mad…but it was all in Spanish, Laura swam off donning her cheap goggles and left me to it, i was stuck…I kept trying to swim away but they kept following so I ducked under the water and swam as far away as I could, popped my head back up but I hadnt got very far at all. They were sweet enough but all I wanted to do was swim in the rain. We got out feeling completely content and still excited. We laughed all the way back to the hotel where green eyes thought we were nuts too.
We decided to go out for a few drinks to celebrate our great feat. We started in the bar with swings we had a few beers and swung a bit before moving on to Senor Frogs (dare i say it!) we arrived as all these breakdancers were giving it some to Bob Sinclair! Laura noticed the bass guitarist that we had met the week before so we went over to chat to him…she still cant remember his name even though she thought he was absolutely gorgeous (Laura doesnt remember names or places very well so he shouldnt be offended). We also met Christian the lead guitarist, wearing a bandana looking all cool! I got dragged up to do the conga, got a free shot and had to get onstage…laura just laughed her head off at me, she calls herself a friend :-(!! Laura left early and by that time I was quite happy to stay on my own. I met a chap called Kirk who was an American and loved to do a bit of breakdancing and kept doing a Run DMC square up to the breakdancing boys which was quite amusing as he wasnt that good. Then I met Hugo or Hugo met me, one of the breakdancers, he is gorgeous and kept calling me sexy Amanda and his English Girlfriend which was lovely and got me hook, line and sinker, i can tell ya. People who know me know how i love to breakdance so i dropped to the floor to show Hugo and the others my moves as a circle formed around me…I lay on my back with my knees up whilst Kirk spinned me round. I dont think Hugo was that impressed hehe. I turned down Kirks offer of going skinny dipping as there was already one moon out,,,no one needed to see my full one. I went back to Hugos as he had 7 kittens he wanted to show me, they were so cute and only 2 weeks old.
Tuesday 8th July
We went for our free breakfast then had a little walk. We both wanted a siesta so I went to the beach for a sleep while Laura slept in the room. We got ready for another night on the tiles, popped over to the hostel across the road for tequila and beer then to our favourite restaurant next door to have our favourite food of spag bol and fahitas and our BOGOF draught beer. After that we headed to Senor Frogs again! We arrived to the conga, so knowing that you get a free shot at the end we joined in! Street Cred out of the window. We sat at the swings at the bar and waited for ages to get served….whilst we waited we got chatting to Scott and Ryan from Texas…Scott was a feeling a bit flush so bought us drink after drink after drink which we didnt complain about. I whisked Ryan off for a boogie and he bought me a rose bless him, he was a sweetie but not my cup of tea, especially as Hugo was there!
Wednesday 9th July
We awoke in a very giggley and mischievous mood so with gusto we went to our local to try for a Leo Sayer, we had a couple and had a laugh with the bar tender. I also noticed a sign which said GayCock which obviously made us children laugh hysterically. Not making it to the bitter end Laura went for a lie down in the room whilst I went off to the beach. It wasnt sunny and had a breeze so the perfect weather for a little snooze. I reached the usual spot, lay my sarong out, and plonked myself down with all my flab hanging out… then 3 gorgeous boys approached me to let me know about ladies night at beach bar, Coco Maya…all i wanted was a little nap but oh no now all i can think about is what to wear and how hot they were! So i gathered my stuff and went back to round Laura up for a ladies night extravaganza.
We got ready, sprayed a bit of perfume in all the right places and off we went…after a few vodkas and tequillas the flyer boy wanted to dance…it was still early and no one was on the dancefloor arrrrrr but I thought i would show the youngsters how to do it… a bit of salsa and a bit of cabbage had me hot and bothered so i retired to Laura and her fits of giggles! We moved on to another bar where there was another ladies night and were ushered past loads of queuing people, including women, so really didnt understand what was going on but didnt really care as long as we got in and didnt have to pay…which we did get in and we didnt have to pay! We met Maria, who we needed to help find a husband, it was a meat market in there so we all could find husbands for a night if we wanted to, luckily Hugo saved me! Laura and I were still in our mischievous mood so we started pinching bums then looking away when they looked round…and tickling waiters armpits as they were carrying trays of drinks over their heads, we all found it highly entertaining! As the sun came up enough became enough so we went homeward bound after a very free evening yippee
Thursday 10th July
We went to our favourite Italian place for an Italian lunch, funnily enough, the pasta was divine. On the long walk back we ran into Pablo from the dive school, he didnt know we were back so he was pleased to see us and we had a giggle on the street. He was going out for drinks (which was a rarity) that evening so invited us along. Having a few hours to kill I went for another lie down on the beach in the usual spot with “Wichmond the ipod” and managed to pass out this time from 4-6pm! There was a shadow over me from the palm trees and the beach was deserted when I woke up hehe. We got ready again and met Pablo in a lovely bar that had trees growing inside it. Apparently it was a gringo bar but luckily they werent in there when we were there. We had a lovely “getting to know you” session with Pablo then he had to leave to meet his girlfriend so left us to it. We headed to Karens for a bit of nosh before heading down to Senor Frogs again! eek! Its cheesier than cheese there but its great laughing at people who take it seriously. I feel sorry for the band and the breakdancers as they are there doing the same thing every single night of the week..my idea of tedious but I suppose beats an office job. <Hugo´s kittens decided to eat my headphones, well one of them, i had to tape it up like Jack Duckworth´s glasses! Luckily Laura has a couple of spare pairs in her mary poppins bag that im borrowing.
Friday 11th July
Had our free breakfast, we have started abusing the “either croissant or cereals” and have both. We also have 2 cups of coffee and 2 glasses of fruit juice. Cost saving tip coz then you dont need to buy lunch. Headed for the beach to have a little swim and bask in…you guessed it….our usual spot for a few hours. The sand still gets to Laura…she HATES IT which is a shame on a sandy beach so can only stand it for a few hours especially as the wind was blowing all the sand onto her sarrong today! We went back to our lovely room, had showers and headed to what can only be described a noodle heaven, and i dont even like noodles as much as Laura. The place was called Baby´s and the food was absollllutely gorgeous. We then went to Scuba Playa to book our 2 dives to swim with turtles the next day. We had an early night as we had to be up early so caught up with our chores…which consists of walking to the launderette and handing our clothes over and then going back a couple of hours later…chores of a traveller are horrendous and so time consuming!
Saturday 12th July
Woke with funny tummy as always happens before diving! Wandered to the dive school and met our instructor, Armando which is nearly my name so he suggested marriage…Armando and Amanda a match made in heaven! We were given the pre dive drill, got all equipped and headed off. It took about 45 minutes to reach our first dive site, Tortuga (turtle in spanish, how apt). It was a drift dive which i was slightly nervous about having never done it before and having trouble equalising. I was still near the surface, drifting with Armando whilst Laura and Hector were at the bottom not drifting as far…the pressure was on but finally i made it. Drift diving is easier than normal diving as the current just takes you to where you want to go, its only when you see a turtle in another direction when you need to kick with all your might. We reached a coral wall and there he was turtle number 1, just sitting there whilst little fish circle him trying to eat the barnacle off his back, the water was so clear you could see for about 30 metres, this is when diving feels like you are floating in air its the most amazing feeling, everyone should try it. We saw some parrot fish, moray eels, Red Snapper and lots of other fish. The only problem is I wanted to shout out as I love to talk and wanted to say how amazing it was when no hand signal could amount to it but then getting a mouthful of water and every time you smile your mask fills up with water too! We saw another 2 turtles swimming along and 1 more in the coral reef before it was time to surface.
The boat picked us up and we enjoyed our surface interval near Xcaret discussing what we saw down there. We moved on to our 2nd dive site which wasnt far from Tortugo so there was another chance we could see more turtles (which are beautiful creatures). Armando is a great instructor and pointed out some lobster, crab, fish, that we wouldnt have spotted. We were bobbing along when I couldnt see Laura, I looked up and there she was swimming with a turtle as it was going to the surface, I could tell she was smiling, especially as she had to clear her mask afterwards. We all got really close to a few more turtles…another highlight of my trip for sure. We got back to the dive school and had to try and work out how to get to Guatemala as we were told that we couldnt miss Semuc Champey, luckily Armando is well travelled so he drew us a little map of how to get there cheaply. We went to La Taberna for some food and had an early night exhausted.
Sunday 12th July
We got up, went to the internet cafe to plan our journey…which we managed to do fairly quickly and I headed for the beach as it was my last day to enjoy it. It became overcast and I noticed loads of people gathering and staring out in to the distance taking photos. I had a little look and there it was, a black line in the sky…it was a tornado…you could see the splashes in the water from it. I cant really describe it but it was crazy. I lay there like a maddun for a while then went back to the hotel to tell Laura to batten down the hatches…but it didnt come to that.
We wanted to go out with a bang so we started off with a few beers at home then meandered to the bar with the trees inside it…the bar lady was trying to convince us to buy 11 beers for a good price but we Brits turned her down. The noodle place was shut unfortunately so we went to Karens for our last supper and we are glad we did. The waiter massaged us then got me up to dance Salsa and I wasnt even tipsy! Laura stayed at the sidelines laughing at my expense..again..then another diner, who i thought worked there at the time, got me up to dance a bit of Salsa. I was passed around like a parcel at a birthday party. Laura likes to call the locals oompa loompas, which isnt a bad description of them really. Apart from the fact that they arent orange and dont have green hair but they are little. One wanted me to sit on his lap and you really couldnt see him!
After all that excitement we went to the touristy shop to get some snaps of us in ponchos and sombraros, just what real Mexicans wear..hmm. We made the shop keeper laugh and he even demolished part of his shop to get us our outfit…and took the picture. We carried on walking down 5th Avenue and we bumped into Hugo who had just finished at Senor Frogs and was off to Coco Maya for another dancey thing…when i looked around Laura was in another shop with a stupid mask on…I didnt recognise her! Wanting to do the same we tried on mask after mask, the shop keepers were even trying them on and posing for our pictures..they loved it. I was Spiderman, a Wrestler and Robin…Laura was Batman, a funny girl with weird hair and a wrestler…it was so funny I think we nearly wet ourselves! We then went back to our hotel, Laura went to bed and I ended up sitting outside at the table and chairs listening to my ipod, thinking about life…then a chap called Declan from Wales disturbed my peace and we ended up chatting until the early hours of the morning. Anything to borrow his lonely planet of central america hehe.
There I will leave you for another week…
Take care all and I still love you all very much and miss you hundreds and thousands.
Amanda “with many disguises” Oakley xx
Amanda's Big Trip 
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